Misheard Lyrics Are Sometimes Better Than The Original

During high school, we all go through weird fads/interests that mold us or cause us to shamefully regret ourselves years down the road. Whether cut off jeans were your thing... or maybe big bangs and ratted hair... or maybe wearing Jyncos... or possibly even Mullets and Mustaches. Well in full disclosure, I was somewhat follicly challenged so the Mullet and Mustache was a no go and I didn't have the thighs for cut off jeans. This left me with the only logical fad which was a weird interest in musicals, that is correct I thrived on "Getting my Head in the Game"(High School Musical) and introducing myself as one of the "Nicest Kids in Town"(Hairspray) . (I just noticed that both of those shows oddly star Zac Efron which has no relation or influence on my interest in musicals).

Maybe if I had watched more Grease and Newsies I could have learned some charm from the T-Birds or a young Christian Bale and actually gone on dates in high school. Who doesn't remember the smoothness of Kenickie... "A Hickie from Kenickie is like a Hallmark card!" or the courage of Jack Kelly as he "Opened the Gates and Seized the Day". The underlying reason I enjoyed musicals was because regardless of the situation anyone could break out into a random song that didn't always make sense but as Will Ferrell famously said "It Gets the People Going"!! Musicals make you just want to get up and dance and occasionally even bust out into song.

This interest in musicals has come and gone just like your old cut offs and Hammer pants but what remains with me is the desire to bust out into random singing. To this day I make up lyrics to popular songs and just sing them at the least opportune times and my poor wife has to suffer through it. My motto is life is a musical so why don't we just start singing every chance we get and "Get the People Going". Ever since I have become a parent I have made up multiple songs and sang them at our kids which has often lead to crying and tears (Mostly from my wife). Due to the fact that these songs are better shown than simply typed I have created GIFs to accompany a few of the songs I have sang recently. With every post that I do... I apologize in advance but hope you enjoy a little glimpse into the sad life my wife and kids are experiencing!


Michael Jackson: Bad

"I'm Dad... I'm Dad... I'm really really Dad, You know I'm Dad... I'm Dad... I'm really really Dad, and the whole family has to answer right now just to tell you once again... whose Dad?"

NSync: Bye Bye Bye

"I wanna see you on the floor. Baby, Cry... Cry... Cry..."

DJ Khaled: All I Do Is Win

"All I do is Twin, Twin, Twin no matter what! Got Mommy on my mind I can never give her up!!"

Eiffel 65: Blue (Da Ba Dee)

"Lines Blue Da Ba Dee Da Ba Dee which means full of the Pee, Da Ba Dee Da Ba Doo don't forget about the Poo!"

Silento: Watch Me (Whip/Nae Nae) 

"Now watch me Wipe, Wipe...

...Now watch me Spray, Spray!!"

21 Pilots: Heathens

"All my kids are Teethin make it stop... Please don't change any sudden moods, I only see half of the tooth!"

Feel free to share my ridiculousness with anyone you wish, I hope you enjoyed it and next time you are doing monotonous things around the house I encourage you to bust into song. It will improve even the worst days, if not for you for everyone watching you!!

-Joshua Soffe

Hammer, Needle, and Hook

In the world of little league athletics there are annual competitions that separate the individual from their team, helping to determine who is the "Goat"🐐 (Greatest of all time) of the sandlot and gridiron. They all have catchy names that define the very skills they measure... "Punt, Pass, and Kick", "Drive, Chip, and Putt", "Pitch, Hit, and Run", and "Dribble, Dish, and Swish". These competitions are meant to measure the all around athleticism rather than focus on one skill. I bring this up because as a child I was so skilled I never was invited to any of these competitions but if I was I am sure I would have been good at making everyone else look even better. I have always been a better athletic supporter (not that kind of athletic supporter!!) than a star athlete. This is not the case with my in laws, they have delivered 3 college athletes and at least 6 high school state championships. To put it into perspective I am like Cooper Manning! Who is Cooper Manning you may ask? He is the oft forgotten brother of Super Bowl MVP's Eli and Peyton Manning. This means that no matter the sport or game we play "the odds are not ever in my favor"(Yes... Even if we played Hunger Games). Lets just say when we pull out the Spikeball, Pickleball, or even if we ever played Checkers it would be a remake of this classic commercial...

Knowing that I would always lose a "Punt, Pass, and Kick" or a "Pitch, Hit, and Run" against my wife and her brothers I recently created to my own competition that I have so appropriately called the "Hammer, Needle, and Hook".  Move over athletic competition, there is a new sheriff in town and his name is Crafting! Which is only fitting that a Stay at Home dad becomes a Master Crafter (Not the Boat). I am new to the Master Crafter role but am willing to show some of my budding "Hammer, Needle, and Hook" experiments.

Hammer: Armour I made to store all of our twin girls clothes with wainscoted doors.

Needle: A car seat foot cover made out of a wet suit, to keep those babies covered!

Hook: Hats crocheted for the Nephews and Nieces.

So the moral of the story/point of this post is feel free to go out of your comfort zone and bend the "norm". Also my advice, if you can't win in any type of athletic competition... pick up obscure hobbies because believe me I bet I am much better at sewing and crocheting than Michael Jordan!!

So remember... "Some will Sew and some will Reep!", if you aren't good at reeping, you can always try sewing! (Just don't let any of your friends find out!😅)

-Joshua Soffe